Sunday, October 28, 2012

Can you please stop asking I just don't know

It's become the bane of my existence, and it's just going to get worse as I get closer to graduation. Every, and I mean every, social event I go to, I get asked the same set of questions. "Where are you going to college? What are you going to major in?"

I have one answer I want to give to all of those questions: I DON'T KNOW. I understand that I'm in my junior year of high school. But still. It's the first trimester. I don't have to have this stuff figured out yet. I'll get it figured out in good time. 

I get that it's just a conversation starter. But it's simply annoying. Ask me how school's going or how work is going. I can answer questions about the past. However, as a teenager, I simply do not think about the future. I can do that tomorrow, right?

Colleges don't seem to get this either. Starting in my sophomore year of high school, I began receiving letters and emails from colleges, proclaiming the wonderful programs that their facilities have to offer. Do you know how many of those I've opened and read? None of them. I'll probably just end up using the letters as kindling for fires or something. How many of these letters or emails actually affect peoples' decisions on what college to go to? Thanks University of *insert state name here,* I appreciate you putting my name into your system for your computers to print on those shiny postcards with the prettiest pictures of your campus on them. It really means a lot to me. But I most likely will not end up going to your college. Anyway, at this point in my life, I already have my choices narrowed down to a select few.

Now, I'm being told I need to start looking into the ACT and college visits. Wait, what? I'm a junior. A sixteen year old. I can hardly decide what I want to eat for breakfast. Now you want me deciding what I'm going to do with my future? Holy cow. It just kind of hits you in the face. Man, the rest of my life is coming, eh? It's kind of scary. 

But at least for a little while longer, I can ignore it. I'll let those college letters pile up, pretending I'm just really popular or something. I'll store those college emails away in a folder, pretending the number isn't quickly approaching the five hundreds. I'll still be a little girl, plenty of time left in high school to enjoy whatever she has left of her childhood. Summers can still be about having fun, and the school year is just a brief interruption of that. I'll have time to worry about the future once it gets a little closer. After all, procrastination is what I'm best at.

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